Disclaimer : Below there is mention of "abuse" which happened at the hospital. I was just figuring out still what the appropriate term is for what happened, and I'd like to note that according to law, that is not yet the legal term for what happened. Right now I'm in the process of preparing to file a complaint about what I think is professional misconduct, and you can see record of that here. Please note that what I call abuse here is not necessarily called that until it is reviewed by the CPSBC and they will legally decide if it can be fully called professional misconduct.
I suppose it's best to do a separate post about my follow up with my family doctor today about the emergency room visit the day before yesterday. I'll try not to reiterate too much from the previous post. You can read that post first if you want to be more filled in.
Unfortunately, my doctor had not yet gotten all the reports and data from the hospital yet, but had gotten at least enough to fill me in on some new information. We have another appointment in a week to confirm about my main question which was about what kind of a specialist it is which I've been referred to from the hospital about this colonoscopy they mentioned. My doctor was able to not only confirm my suspicions but even more teach me that a colonoscopy is by no means necessary and will not at all be standard, and so it's fully confirmed that the mention of it was abuse at the hospital. That was immediately addressed as my first concern. The doctor said that to search for a possible fistula, an MRI is the standard procedure, not at all a colonoscopy. And to reiterate, this was said as what they will have done, after a completely unnecessary finger-done anal exam with finger entry, which was with my uninformed consent.
And it's presumed by my doctor that supposedly, whatever specialist they said they would refer me to would be for the MRI, but in a week we'll touch base to confirm that and discuss if there is any concern about the referral's appropriateness to my condition.
I was given a sheet to look at about the referral which in my drugged and tired state (with also my eyesight blurring more than usual) I glanced at, assuming it would have the information about the referral on it, but it had no information like that, as I found later. It only said from the surgery department I will receive a phone call.
And about the abuse, I'll have to look into it a bit more but it's my understanding that this was the type of abuse which is completely clear as what it is, although wouldn't be criminally chargeable because technically there is some semblance of a real procedure somehow imaginable to it. So I have really learned such a lesson about how sexual and psychological abuse can take place at hospitals without being charged. All they have to do is find a way that there's some abstract reasoning that it's a normal procedure and even if it's not at all a true standard straightforward and proper approach for a procedure, it can be considered technically under the law. Because it's technically under the law that "making mistakes" is acceptable. And that clarifies just most likely exactly how I was raped anally at the hospital at age 24 during my tubliigation surgery. I was told that the surgery doesn't require any entry into the anus but my anus had been massively entered as I discovered upon waking from surgery, and it seems possible to me now based on this new experience that this may have been a "procedure", an unnecessary one, abstractly reasoned even though it had nothing honest to do with it. Although could have been worse, and I'll never know. But at least I now know that kind of thing is one type of abuse that happens at hospitals.
So anyway, that's an added stress of course, but everything else seems in order. Now, I also have an ultrasound referred as well by my doctor, in sae's normal follow up to the CT that was done at the hospital. Because the CT imagining was only initially scanned for what they were looking for then, but it was further looked at and the results sent to my doctor. And they found what may be a fibroid. Now, a fibroid is another unrelated issue which women sometimes have during hormone changes, and I have been having some pre-menopausal issues. The fibroid needs to be removed if it's there, and I think it makes sense that I do have it. It's something which can cause extended, longer periods. And recently I did have a very surprisingly long period of 7 days of blood, which is unusual for me. So I probably have a fibroid too that needs to be removed.
Now I already had an ultrasound that I was trying to get from my doctor's referral about the other cyst that might be in my digestive area, just incase it's that and not a hernia. It's the question weather it's a cyst or a hernia, by ultrasound. But I'd had some issues reaching them back on the phone after I missed their call, and that turns out to be no big deal. Cause now what's going on is, my doctor can additionally inform them to also check for the fibroid when they're doing that same ultrasound, and let them know I've had trouble reaching them on the phone. So, I will look for their call.
So, I explained to my doctor that it does seem more likely that the abscess was just caused by a cyst and not a fistule, but my doctor thinks it's perfect not to care, cause all we have to do is check for the fistule anyway just to rule it out and then we can get on with things. And I don't think it should be too long before I can get that MRI to rule it out too, so it shouldn't be an issue with time lag here.
Now, I've started a new run of clavilin antibiotics for the abscess which to me really seems needed actually in my opinion. But I did ask them at the hospital if that should be any concern considering that I have infections starting in my mouth obviously from a candida imbalance. Thank goodness, right now all the infections I had on my gum area and my tongue, are under control and painless now (almost totally). That was partially from using lots and lots of alcohol on the gum area, which I knew would be a danger to my tongue infection by putting flora out of balance in my tongue. But anyway, it all actually worked out. My tongue did suffer, but the gum is nearly fixed and the tongue has healed back on its own. I asked them at the hospital "Is this antibiotic any worries for candida imbalance issues?" and they said no, like "Um, I don't know. I don't think so, no" for the new run I'm taking now, and straight up No. Not with this kind of antibiotic" with the kind they gave me through IV. That's not true.
I asked my doctor and sae said it absolutely is well known to be of course an issue for that, as well as the kind on IV, and so they gave me false information at the hospital for sure. But my doctor and I both agreed that it definitely just seems way more important to take the antibiotics for this abscess anyway right now, because the gum infection's under control right now and we can address any other mouth infections later. And I just actually really agree. The abscess has largely drained, but now the hole that was burst in it has healed and it's no longer draining, but there is still a liquidy part left, pretty small. And I tried today to normally sit on pavement just outside when I was waiting for my prescription, for 10 minutes, and it hurt a lot afterwards for like an hour as a result. And I just feel like it totally needs help. There's been lots of potential bacteria touching it and everything throughout this process, so I have no question it's a dangerous issue and not within the realm of it would be better to let it heal on its own like previous times when I've had this abscess but it didn't drain outwardly. Previously the body did work it out on its own again and again, but I'm not confident right now with that kind of thing.
So I told my doctor also that I'm happy to research a fistula and a fibroid on ChatGPT and sae offered too, sae'd love to also send me official doctor's education files to give me all that I need to know about what they are. So I will be receiving that in my online messages from sae. And sae will also provide any additional messages if anything of interest comes through about the fistula specialist or whatnot, and yet will also follow up with me in a week. Because also, it'd be good to check on me then and see how it resolved with the antibiotics.
And I felt a little nervous that I didn't manage to get the antibiotics yesterday, the day after the ER, but I was just too tired and emotionally exhausted from everything. Then I worried a little. But I'm sure it's OK. And I will totally call my doctor to let sae know if anything's getting worse about it during the course.
And I have my nice homemade bandaid all done on the wound now. I actually had some gauze left over from an attempt to make a first aid kit one time, and that was the perfect thing with the tape I have. So I have a proper bandaid just also protecting that area from any urine touching it when I pee, and keeping it extra clean as well as out of the way. And I'm just putting a nice hand cream on it.
And yeah I feel pretty stressed out just that there was abuse at the hospital, and also the sense of threat that it could be a fistula really is a bit of a stress, cause Chron's Disease is REALLY fuckin serious and hardcore. But at least I know it's probably not a fistula, thank God, and I also comfort myself that now that I have my nice bandaid I actually feel all fixed up (lol). And it's nice knowing I will have the MRI soon to have that out of the way. But yeah, I've been thinking a lot about the abuse that happened at the hospital at that one time later in the process with the nurse and surgeon specialist doctor there. And I've been thinking so much about the facial expressions of the nurse and the demeanour of the surgeon. And I feel like this was a case where it looked like the surgeon was more corrupt than the nurse, even though the nurse is technically responsible for sae's actions. It's just that it seems to reveal that working as a nurse under a superior who is corrupt can lead to psychotic issues like just feeling freaked out inexplicably drawn to doing wrong procedures like that and "making mistakes" where it's almost for real by accident and they know it's wrong but they're so overwhelmed with this freakout situation of things like that going on normally there that they feel just simply not even that worried about it in a way. And I actually almost feel like the way the nurse was acting, expressing so much alarm around the rape potential view on what's happening, seemed to indicate perhaps that sae had an interest in exposing their superior through this event.
And I'll probably do another post just about the abuse at my MeToo index of abuse stories of what I've experienced in my life. And again, I understand this was not technically a criminal act, but it's still abuse and I have to look up what that's called. I think it's just called systemic abuse of some kind, where technically it's protected under law that this can totally happen with no criminal consequences but that's commonly taken advantage of.
And originally when I met my family doctor, I informed sae who is the most wonderful doctor, that I had been raped at the hospital at age 24 and sexually harassed multiple times by doctors. And sae was horrified to hear that and had immense compassion, and was always careful to be very courteous of that issue with me in every way. But at this time, I didn't really want to burden my family doctor with this story really, cause it seems like a burden right now to my doctor, and I don't think it's sae's job to have to handle the issue right now. It's just that it's clarified what my doctor says about these procedures. But I could always say to my doctor maybe next time if it seems pertinent to the needs of the consultation.
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